'Tis the Season in Sydney.

Sometimes promises have to be broken for something bigger; something more close to home. Sometimes you don't have a choice in agreeing to a promise. Sometimes when you hesitantly make a promise, you know in your heart of heart it's not going to happen. It wasn't feasible, possible, logistical, rational, defensible or even financially-responsible to stay in Australia for a promise. I couldn't bear to break it, I felt terrible, but I knew that I had to do it. Sometimes you have to make your own decisions, hopefully with good intentions, even if they hurt people knowing absolutely that that part is not part of the main objective. Even when it appears to be selfish, there's always another side to the story that might not be regarded, that could be for the greater good if you take the time to consider it. 

As it turned out, I wasn't flying out of Brisbane. When flying out of Brisbane I had to connect in Sydney anyways. And as it turned out, both my parents and I thought I would be returning to Sydney for Christmas so I had left a bag of things there I didn't need for traveling and they had mailed some Christmas presents for me. So, I had to go back no matter what. Because of my broken promise, I booked to spend two nights in Sydney to make up for it. But I don't think it was enough. Things were miscommunicated, plans were not met, and words were said. Instead, I spent most of my time wandering around Sydney as I had wanted to explore it on my own, with one last goodbye, and one last attempt of Christmas shopping before it would become Duty Free. All I could think of was going home, getting on the plane as fast as possible, seeing my parents and surprising Jess. As much as I didn't want to leave Australia, or say goodbye to the friends I had met, I just wanted to be home. 

Dear Australia,

I really like you. I like you a lot.

Love, Shauna

It all happened so fast. At one point while in Mission Beach, alone and far away, an idea sprouted and I planted it in Dad's head, but displaced it in the back of my mind to slowly germinate. I felt a bit lost, broke, and exhausted from traveling. I was at a point, again, where I wasn't sure which direction of life I was heading towards and any decision could waver the compass' arrow.* I just had a little over a month left in sunny Australia before my visa was up and I thought about just giving in and going home. All the decisions and options of what to do with the remainder of my time could easily be dissipated and solved if I just left them all behind and went home. Home, you may ask, is where? My flight back was booked on miles and Dad checked to see if they could be changed. The only options he could find were to fly either on Christmas back to America, when my family would be in Ireland, or on the 8th of January which wouldn't make any sense to leave just a week early. So, the idea to leave evaporated into the humid heat of northern Queensland and I continued making plans to get back to Brisbane and find a job. 
After dismissing all regional work, finally deciding I didn't want to spend the rest of my time here working towards a second year that I wasn't even sure I wanted to return for, I was set on finding a holiday job. I was flying out of Brisbane, I had friends that were there, it was close to the Gold Coast...it just made sense to go to Brisbane. The only hitch was that I had promised to be in Sydney for Christmas and had made plans for New Years Eve there too. So, technically I had two weeks to work in Brisbane, a week in Sydney, then another 2 weeks of work in Brisbane. Who would hire me for that amount of time - even if I lied about how much time I had there? Sydney was too expensive that I barely gave two thoughts about looking for a place to stay and a job there. 

I didn't think it would be hard to find a job, given most places usually hire extra staff around the holiday season, but I couldn't find any job. I didn't even get any responses back. There were no appropriate jobs posted on seek or indeed or gumtree. I blindly wrote to places of interest, in hopes that they might like my resume or just need some extra help. I wrote to all the Irish pubs in the city - just to confuse them with my wonky accent. I printed out my resume and went around to all the hostels to ask if they were hiring. Everyone said, come back in the new year. I had a place to stay for free (I paid rent with tree-building beer cans) but I couldn't justify staying in Australia for a month, just for the sake of seeing out the rest of my visa, if I wasn't working and I was done with traveling. So the idea that was already planted in Dad's head and buried in the back of my head, began to flourish. It was hard to cancel New Years Eve plans and to think about not only leaving my friends, but the sunshine warmth of summer and to finally leave behind the entire year that was my Australian Adventure. But, once the idea developed into a realisation that I could spend Christmas with my family in Ireland, I was all set and started to check out. The fact that I could pull of a surprise and not tell Jess I was coming made it all the more exciting. Once I realised all this, I went back to happy holiday mode and decided to just enjoy and take advantage of the rest of my time in Australia, trying not to spend the dim remainder of my money, and to soak up as much sun as possible. I think also the fact that I was going to Donegal rather than flying back to America made leaving somewhat more ok. It wouldn't be easy to leave, but I was actually really really excited. 

* I think I should buy a Magic 8 ball as my indecisive compass. 

When it Rains, it Pours.

Carly and I tried desperately to go Christmas shopping in Brisbane. Desperately I mean because we bought nothing and because it was in the pouring rain, but we persevered. We walked for about half an hour in the rain until we got into the centre of the city, completely drenched, but unwavered. We wandered in and out of the shops before we decided we would be better off purchasing a drink. So we got out of the rain and sat down with the workers, who weren't working because it was raining (!??!) and enjoyed ourselves. Just as we were leaving, even though the sky was bright, it was heavily downpouring. We sighed and said, you know what happens when it rains? You get wet. 

Bar artwork.

It's really hard to feel like it's Christmas or get in the holiday spirit when it is sunny, 30 degrees CELCIUS, and feels like you are on a summer holiday. The tourist shops offering Australia memorabilia are filled with crap no one really wants. Most of the stores in the shopping arcades are over priced and the rest of them can be found at home. There aren't any Australian trends or anything particularly "Australian" to bring back as gifts. I found it incredibly difficult to not only to get in the mood but to find any motivation for buying worthwhile gifts. I sent some knick-knacks to Ireland to say, I'm thinking of you, wish I was there, I have some more time to buy you some proper gifts ie in the after-Christmas sales, but that mentality soon changed. I always thought that I didn't care where I was for Christmas as long as I was on the beach with a cocktail. But after traveling up the coast for a month and seeing beach after beach, I was over the beach idea. I wanted to go home. Home? I don't know where home is. I wanted to be with my family. 

this one's for jess.

March 8

It was a Thursday and winery work started at 5am to meet the night-picked Riesling grapes. Walking out of the house at 4:50am, the early moonlit morning seemed quite bright as the cloudless sky exposed it's illuminating stars - it never ceases to amaze and impress me. I knocked my head back, mouth silently gasped open, and I smiled as I realized I could appreciate being awake so early to witness such a simple sight yet of such a profound infinity. The moon was high in the sky and full. Right after I snapped the picture, I turned around just in time to see a shooting star fall above the dark shadowed line of the trees. And I thought, today is going to be a good day. Grinning in the dark, I whispered, Happy Birthday Jessypoo!

I admit. I was a bit emotional. 

Shit Australians Say.

My family sent me a package for Valentines Day. After arriving in Perth, it finally arrived in Frankland River on March 7th. Never to late for a good thing!!  It made me so happy it made me cry. I've read the three personalized cards already a couple times over. I wonder if Dad, aka my secret admirer, actually picked out the card himself - it was a goodie. Mum's was inspired by an inspirational quote (see next post). And in Jess' note, she suggested I start a new post called, Shit Australians Say. Laughing outloud, I concur. So here it is. 

Rod Stewart. The Concert.

When I learned that Rod Stewart was playing in Perth on February 4th, 2012, I knew that was the real reason I was going to Australia, the real reason I was going to Western Australia. Everyone always asks, why Perth? Most of the people I have met who have been to Australia have only been to the eastern side of the country and said that Perth was too far away, yet they generally had a sense of regret in not going. Imagine the size of the United States, and New York, Boston, Miami, Chicago, Dallas, and LA were all along the eastern coast, but there was only San Diego on the west. That's kinda like what Perth is. So I figured, why not start on the west and make my way east. Everyone here think I'm absolutely nuts for wanting to take the train across the outback to go from west to east, but that's such a huge part of the continent....why miss it?? I digress, I DIGRESS! Back to Rod. The real reason I'm in Perth, Western Australia is to see Rod Stewart. There was no denying the fact that I was buying tickets to this concert. Sure, I stalled for a while in buying the tickets as they were so expensive, I wasn't sure if anyone would want to go with me, I wasn't sure where I'd actually be in February, and I wasn't really sure if Rod would still be kickin' it so many months ahead. But, with the eternal thanks and help from Chris and Beth for sponsoring my purchase with my Christmas and Birthday gift, I splurged on the best seats available (with ticket insurance, which I never get, but just in case).

Rod Stewart is one sexy beast.

This night, completely sober with Fun Bobby, may have been the highlight of my entire trip so far. That's hard to beat because I've had a lot of fun and a lot of good nights here. But man oh man does Rod put on a good show. I have to admit, I was a little nervous - how old is he? I kept thinking back to the Justin Timberlake concert with Jess in Boston a couple years ago and how he brought sexy back with those dance moves. Avoiding his ramen noodle hair and looking at his feet could make anyone fall in love with JT. But Rod brought sexy to a whole new level. Sure, U2 is a overly-elaborate concert held together with its classic tunes, I could watch Tina Turner in concert on TV any time it's on, and heck, I even had a great time at N*Sync (or is it 'Nsync? NsYnC*?) , my first ever concert that we were tricked into going - completely covered in bug spray as we thought we were going camping. But Rod Stewart, Perth, February 4th, 2012 was by far the best concert I have ever been to.

 I don't know about old fart Fun Bobby, but I think I was definitely one of the youngest people in the audience. I would even dare to say by even at least 15-20 years. These women were decked out in their leopard print outfits that probably haven't been worn since 1978 when he released his album Blondes Have More Fun (it's true, the Australian sun has turned my hair a funny brassy colour. needs.fixed.asap).

The concert was at nib Stadium which, besides musical concerts, is home to rugby matches. Our seats were on the grass, a bit far back but in the first row of our section. As we sat in anticipation for the start of the show, I commented on how awful a job it must've been to set up all the chairs in the grass, row after row. Two security guards looking quite solemn walked by and Fun Bobby remarked on how terrible a job it must be to be patrolling a Rod Stewart concert - how much trouble could there possibly be? Oh, women will be getting ROWDY over Rod Stewart, I replied. I even have an extra pair of panties in my bag to throw up on stage. (joke. but I did see some flying up on stage). We sat next to this British couple who had seen Rod in concert 30 years ago - I wasn't even alive! The woman got up immediately when the show started and was dancing wildly in the aisle - it was awesome.* But, despite how much fun she and some other people were having rockin out in their old people way, dancing was not allowed. Enter the security guards. Job necessary. Trouble was certainly brewing. One pretty-hippy-looking couple spent more time arguing with the officers about being allowed to dance than probably watching and enjoying the actual show. So the dancers had to keep moving about, always in someone's view, someone always complaining about their freedom of enjoyment, so much so that the husband of the couple next to us said to his wife, "the next time they tell you to move or stop, let me know and I will deal with it." so cute. 

*This will be Mum at the Neil Diamond concert this summer.

Rod came out to Love Train - and the crowd went wild. Decked out in a pink tuxedo, and I swear, Rod Stewart is the only one who could pull that off, he came out with a bang and didn't stop having fun for the entire time. I absolutely love his skinny little legs, his rowdy hair, his laughter ohmygoodness. I don't know where he found them, but the women in his band where gorgeous and could play the saxophone and trumpet and guitar in a little sparkly mini dress and high heels. The whole stage was just sexy. He took off his jacket shortly after, and was only wearing a white button down, skinny pink tie and skinny trousers. Then, half way through the song, an assistant came out and he changed his shoes on stage - to pink loafers. I was dying. I was just waiting for him to strip down to just the pink tie and pink loafers. He changed again to some colorful paisley shirt and at the end of the show he was wearing these fabulous silver trainers - I have to find a pair for myself! I don't know how he gets away with it, but he's the epitome of cool.

I think I had a smile on my face for the entire 2 hours. No wait, I'm pretty positive I did.*

* Think Mum's smile from seeing Neil Diamond at the NYC Thanksgiving Parade - it could not be beat. 

The best thing I liked about the concert, well, there were many, but I loved the fact that the entire ensemble seemed to be having so much fun on stage. The concert wasn't about Rod and touring for money or self-promotion. Everyone that was on stage at least had one solo act where they were showcased and excelled in singing or playing an instrument or dancing - everyone was included and everyone had their part. Rod was happy to go off around the stage dancing and shakin' his bacon while the others shined. Ok, maybe there was one guy who blended into the background ("that's racist") but he too got at least two shining moments of glory and boy did he beam. The two drummers were unbelievable and had a little duo where the lead drummer was going at it, surrounded by this glass orb, wearing a pink handkerchief in the jacket's pocket, and the other guy was just laughing and smiling while going back and forth with each other. It was like they couldn't even try to not be adorable. The background screen always seemed to matched the songs perfectly with lots of swirling colors. Rod joked with the crowds, kicked dozens of footballs (soccer balls) into the crowd, admitted when he missed a tune because he swallowed too much summer wind, showed personal photographs of his family, was not afraid to admit that he was avidly following the Scotland-England rugby game during the concert and keeping up with his favorite Celtics match (You're Celtic, United, but baby I've decided you're the best team I've ever seen) His grandson Alistar, who must've been about eight, or ten, I'm really really bad at guessing ages (but seriously, we were some of the youngest there) wearing a Celtic jersey, came on stage at one point and started dancing and then talked into the microphone - no bother.

The entire time, I was on the edge of my seat, waiting to hear You're In My Heart (if I ever got married or heck found someone who wanted to dance with me this would be part of my wedding) and Sailing. The show ended and although I was too high on a delirious euphoria to think about the fact that it hadn't been played, I consoled myself with the fact that I had it on my iPod to listen to later. But Then. The Encore. and guess what it was. SAILING! I could not have been more keenly captivated.  ohmygoodness.

It was a tremendous night. Everyone in the audience was elated, intoxicated with sexiness, savoring the songs, basking themselves in utter pleasure and exhilaration, singing, swaying, clapping, relishing. But, I really wish Dad was there with me. He would've really gotten a kick out of the concert as well and I can't claim any acknowledgement in my love for Rod without giving credit to my dad. Although I immediately think of Irish pub song CDs, Enya, and of course Garth Brook's The Thunder Rolls blaring appropriately in the truck in Texas, Rod Stewart was always right there in Dad's music collection. Was thinking about you Dad! although you were in Ri Ra at the time, not a bad second best :)

Playlist:

Love Train

Tonight's the Night

Some Guys Have all the Luck

First Cut is the Deepest

It's a Heartache

Baby Jane

Forever Young

Nothing but a heartache

Downtown Train

Have I Told you Lately

I Don't Wanna Talk about It

Oh La La - Wish I knew What I Know Now

Sweeter than Rock n Roll - I know that's not the right song title

Tina Turner's Rolling sung by a fantastic back up singer -> JESS: Tina Turner at a Rod Stewart concert = amazing.

Rhythm of My Heart

Twisting the Night Away

Maggie May

In Your Heart

Hot Legs

D'Ya Think I'm Sexy

Sailing

unknown. too busy clapping and laughing and smiling.

I didn't get the $35 bear.

Although I have the really bad, far away, blurry iPhone photos to recapture the concert's memories, I received a gift that night: a Rod Stewart t-shirt. It was the coolest one of the lot and I got it :) I wouldn't dare spend that much over-priced amount on myself, for a t-shirt, but I wore it the next day around town with the biggest smile on my face, just knowing that everyone around me was incredibly jealous that I was at the concert last night and had the t-shirt to prove it.

I know I said that Rod Stewart may have been the reason that brought me to Perth, but in retrospect, if I had thought about it in a better manner, my sole purpose should have really been to follow the Rod Stewart concert tour around Australia. Seriously, what was I thinking?? 

Goodbye 2011, Hello 2012.

The end of 2011 ended with an entire month in Ireland (ok, 3 days in Northern Ireland). The start of 2012 started in Ireland. 2012 may or may not be the end of the world. That saying, 2012 may or may not be a good idea to go half way around the world.

Mum arrived 3 days after me. Dad and Jess arrived the Friday before Christmas. We celebrated Christmas Eve, Christmas Day on Sunday, charades & games, Christmas again on Tuesday with the cousins, holiday cocktail party, trivia night, 80's/90's night at Roonies, New Years Eve, my Birthday, New Years Dip, birthday dinner.

28. Let's not talk about it.

Now everyone is gone.

Three days later - weather permitting- I finally decide to leave the house. For over an hour and a half the sun graciously shone, not a spit of rain or hail stone descended from the January sky while I was outside. The wind, however, was as persistant as ever. In terms of getting some excercise, this means: run in one direction, powerwalk the other way back. The blowing sand stuck to my black yoga pants and Northface pullover, my un-straightened hair tangled in the wind, and my lungs embraced the crisp ocean air. Over the sand dunes, the golfers persevered and I wondered how they could muster up the strength to hit the tiny white ball into the forceful gale winds. It seemed utterly useless to me. But I turned around and looked out upon the thrashing waves breaking the sea, and thought, Killahoey sure does heal the soul. The wind is so loud that it creates a rushing silence so that you cannot focus on anything else, barely hearing your own thoughts. The only thing I could think (despite as many life-changing, world-realization type thoughts you think could be had) was how lucky I was and how special this place was. As I faced the oncoming winds heading home, I wondered if my kids (don't laugh Jess) would ever get to experience Dunfanaghy as it is or what it would be like in a few years. I wondered if I'd ever be able to express what this place means to me, to my family. Regardless of where we leave to, the rhythem of the ocean's waves will continue to constantly play their mesmerizing melody against the sand, still going on and on, minding it's own business, until we come back again. 

 As of today, there are 12 days until I arrive in Perth Australia, 11 days till I spend thirteen hours in the Singapore airport, 10 days until my flight takes off, 9 days until I'm in London and get to see Arina, which means 8 more full days here in Ireland. I miss my family tremendously. Even though they seem far away in America, my heart tightens when I think how much further away they will be, how far I will be halfway across the world. Literally.

Then I think about how much food is left here that I have to eat before I leave! I am not a waster of food. Which is a bad thing, because despite the hour and forty minutes I spent outside today, the only thing I have consumed are 2 cups of coffee, a couple vitamins, and some accompaning glasses of water. The amount of cheese in our fridge, my goodness you'd think I'd be the happiest person to be left with that much, but it is Beach Weather in Australia. The amount of cheese we've eaten here this past month would probably turn anyone vegan as an excuse for a cheese-detox. I LOVE CHEESE.

So as much as I miss my family, I have appreciated the two week detox. As much as I wish the wind didn't damage the Sky box, I read an entire 347 page book in one day. As much as I love this place, I can't wait for summertime in Australia!!

The last weeks in America: a Recap

November 5: last Portsmouth Farmer's Market; a very cold, very quiet farewell. Christmas fair with Mum. Required pre-dinner drinks at Ri Ra, dinner at the One Hundred Club with John, Sheelagh, Frank and Judi.

November 12: last shift at Cava (I think? very possible I was cut, but it was the last day of Restaurant Week so probably not).

November 13: John and Sheelagh leave for NYC with two packed suitcases of mine. I'm left with a shoulder bag to last me for the week and to take to DC next weekend.

November 14-17: eat a lot of frozen soups and breads I had made with the leftover farmers market produce. Read a lot of travel essays.

November 15: Read an entire book in one day.

November 17: last night in Portsmouth. Drink with Judi at Mombo, adio's Tj's, Press Room, Ri Ra, etc....

November 18-20: weekend in DC.

Bucknell themed party with Blue and Orange drinks:

 Blue Moon, Mango Margaritas, Natty Lite's just because,   

 national monuments,

catch-phrase,

 outdoor  markets, smelly dogs, cute dogs, old college photos,

 bloody mary brunch,

 margaritas and birthday,

homemade hot apple cider, UNISG reminiscence, lots of catch up and laughter.

November 20: Trip to NYC. Hello John, Sheelagh & Jess!

November 21-December 1: pack and unpack, pack and unpack, pack and unpack { insert Arina comment } 

November 21: Post Office, Kaluystan's, homemade dinner

November 23: Farmers Market pre-indulgent feast shopping. Cocktail party at Jess's apt. Hello Chris and Beth!

November 24: Thanksgiving. 

Ess-a-bagel, the usual. 

Thanksgiving Day Parade then cooking.

thanksgiving going to her head...

Neil Diamond!! 

Mum after seeing her LOML

Dinner starts with Hibiscus Cava cocktails, homemade turkey liver pate, 

cheese plate with not-puffed-up-cheese-puffs, 

squash apple soup, farmer's market turkey, cranberry chutney, roasted garlic & maple syrup mashed sweet potatoes, roasted fingerling rosemary potatoes, braised greens with kalamata olives and feta, crispy brussel sprouts with garlic chips, broccoli with cheese sauce and crumbled cheetos, balsamic glazed cipollini onions, apple pie, pumpkin pie, crumbs cupcakes and 

Australian wine!

November 25: run in Central Park: my favorite NYC activity. The Australian Bar. 

 Le Souk Harem aka HOOKAH with John, Sheelagh, Chris & Beth

 - love it! 

Tiki drinks with fuzzy cocktail stirrers with family friends

November 26: Brunch at Les Halles, goodbye Chris and Beth,

 run down West Side Highway, old-catch up drinks, 

drinks and out and late night eats like a real New Yorker with Jess & Chloe

November 27: Little Owl brunch and Gottino drinks with Mum & Jess, 

football and farewell drinks for Kim, her required Shack Shake meal, and Eataly.

November 28: Tapas in the old neighborhood

November 29: old local fav Spotted Pig then the Highlands.

November 30: last night in America! 

Momofuku ramen with Mum, Cannibal beer, 

dinner with the fam at Artisanal (I love cheese)

then Pj Clarke's, of course.

December 1: last day in America! quick coffee down in FD, escaping Occupy WS, errands,

 2.5 hour lunch at BareBurger YUM ostrich meat, goodbye Dad and goodbye Mum. Airport. Pinterest laughs. Airplane food. 

Turbulence. More Turbulence. Deep breathes. Woman screaming. Survival, barely, an hour early b/c of the incredible winds.

GOODBYE AMERICA, HELLO IRELAND.